Stories and Jokes

This blog is for stories of how some of our Universal Life Church ministers are using their ministries and also a collection of amusing and clean religious jokes to make you smile.

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Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Universal Life Church

Dear Amy:
 
 
Thanks so very VERY much for hanging in there with me..
 
Your thoughts and comments help and lead me to trust my instincts which are easy to negate.
 
 
When I get through all this I'll be taking some of your courses.
 
Love to you and yours
 
Roy
Universal Life Church 


To become an ordained minister through the Universal Life Church is free and fast.  At our Online Seminary, we believe in training our ministers through distant learning courses, online sermons, weddings and funeral ceremonies and a lot more.  Many of these testimonials are from people who have been receiving our kind words' mailings.  They're free and heartfelt.  I hope you take advantage of them and sign up.

Monday, December 26, 2011

Kind Words

If you desire others to be happy, practice compassion; 
if YOU desire to be happy, practice compassion!
                                                                                 - Mary Stewbeck


To become an ordained minister through the Universal Life Church is free and fast.  At our Online Seminary, we believe in training our ministers through distant learning courses, online sermons, weddings and funeral ceremonies and a lot more.  Many of these testimonials are from people who have been receiving our kind words' mailings.  They're free and heartfelt.  I hope you take advantage of them and sign up.

Sunday, December 25, 2011

Kind Words

 Amy,
Just a quick note to say thanks for all your hard work.  I know the time you spend is great and you never cease to amaze me with the new course, books, ID Cards you keep getting out.  I know I haven't been very active in the Seminary as of late, but it is just I have been so busy with the other aspect of my life and career. 
Well, I hope to be more active in taking courses again in the near future, but for now, know that I am still alive and well and still reading all your emails and bulletins I receive.  I wish you all the best and will be in touch.
--
Sincerely yours,

Judge Edward Singleton, DD, MBA, CPA
Universal Life Church 

Ordination with the Universal Life Church, is free,  and lasts for life, so use the Free Online Ordination, button.We also offer many free wedding ceremonies for your use.  We also offer some kind words, mailed weekly, to brighten your spirit.

Saturday, December 24, 2011

Universal Life Church

I just wanted to say, that I have been receiving this newsletter for almost four years now, and never once have I responded to say thank you. So, thank you. 

Thank you for the wonderful uplifting stories, the charismatic way the organization presents its classes, and for the opportunity the ULC Seminary has given me when it comes to spiritual development. 

I know your busy, so I won’t take up anymore of your time.
Thank you again for everything. 

Jonathan 
Merry Christmas
To become an ordained minister through the Universal Life Church is free and fast.  At our Online Seminary, we believe in training our ministers through distant learning courses, online sermons, weddings and funeral ceremonies and a lot more.  Many of these testimonials are from people who have been receiving our kind words' mailings.  They're free and heartfelt.  I hope you take advantage of them and sign up.

Saturday, December 17, 2011

Kind Words

Thank you Amy, the kind words helped a lot today. I recently performed my first wedding and it was extra special because it was my eldest son's marriage. I have not been able to start on the two classes I ordered over the summer, but I am looking forward to beginning them shortly. Thank you again for the kind and generous words. I am truly enjoying my involvement in the ULC Seminary.

Karen

***********************
As a long time member of ULC, I created the seminary site to help train our ministers. We also have a huge selection of Universal Life Church minister supplies. Since being ordained with the Seminary since the beginning, I've watched and facilitated the huge change and growth that has continued to happen.  I also started sending out Kind Words, which has been a huge hit with the congregation.

Monday, December 12, 2011

Universal Life Church

Dear Amy:
The Great Spirit, God, the flow of the earth,, must have known I needed your attention and words.
Its almost telepathic;   knowing I was bored some years ago in another profession, was one of the main reasons I'm doing what I am.
with sincere appreciation thank you so very much for taking time to speak to this tired confused soul seeking man. 
Your words help..as well as your guidance.
Also I may not get the time to read through all your e-mails on the Seminary courses,  However I've been saving them for years in a special file just for those e-mails.
Thank you and your great Spirit for all the work you are doing,
Sincerely,
Roy
Universal Life Church 
To become an ordained minister through the Universal Life Church is free and fast.  At our Online Seminary, we believe in training our ministers through distant learning courses, online sermons, weddings and funeral ceremonies and a lot more.  Many of these testimonials are from people who have been receiving our kind words' mailings.  They're free and heartfelt.  I hope you take advantage of them and sign up.

Saturday, December 10, 2011

Kind Words

Rev. Amy, I just wanted to tell you the video you did was wonderful. I wish I could vote for you more than once.   I always seam to get a new message just when I need it. You are a miracle and an angel. I am so blessed to have you. Have a blessed day.

June

Ordination with the Universal Life Church, is free,  and lasts for life, so use the Free Online Ordination, button.We also offer many free wedding ceremonies for your use.  We also offer some kind words, mailed weekly, to brighten your spirit.

Friday, December 2, 2011

Kind Words

Hi Amy!!

A double Thank You and God bless! I needed to hear that right now.

You make the world a brighter, happier place!

Back at you ;-)

Chris

***********************
As a long time member of ULC, I created the seminary site to help train our ministers. We also have a huge selection of Universal Life Church minister supplies. Since being ordained with the Seminary since the beginning, I've watched and facilitated the huge change and growth that has continued to happen.  I also started sending out Kind Words, which has been a huge hit with the congregation.

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Kind Words

Thank you so very much Amy!
You could not have known what this bit of encouragement means right now.  The right words at just the right time.  You too are a wonderful person for even thinking of this mailing.
Again, Thank you.
Brightest Blessings,
 ~Laura

Ordination with the Universal Life Church, is free,  and lasts for life, so use the Free Online Ordination, button.We also offer many free wedding ceremonies for your use.  We also offer some kind words, mailed weekly, to brighten your spirit.

Friday, November 25, 2011

Universal Life Church


Public schools anymore
Because the word 'God' is mentioned.....
A kid in Arizona wrote the attached

NEW School prayer:
Now I sit me down in school
Where praying is against the rule
For this great nation under God
Finds mention of Him very odd.
 
If scripture now the class recites,
It violates the Bill of Rights.
And anytime my head I bow
Becomes a Federal matter now.
 
Our hair can be purple, orange or green,
That's no offense; it's a freedom scene..
The law is specific, the law is precise.
Prayers spoken aloud are a serious vice.
 
For praying in a public hall
Might offend someone with no faith at all..
In silence alone we must meditate,
God's name is prohibited by the state.
 
We're allowed to cuss and dress like freaks,
And pierce our noses, tongues and cheeks...
They've outlawed guns, but FIRST the Bible.
To quote the Good Book makes me liable.
We can elect a pregnant Senior Queen,
And the 'unwed daddy,' our Senior King.
It's 'inappropriate' to teach right from wrong,
We're taught that such 'judgments' do not belong..
 
We can get our condoms and birth controls,
Study witchcraft, vampires and totem poles..
But the Ten Commandments are not allowed,
No word of God must reach this crowd.
 
It's scary here I must confess,
When chaos reigns the school's a mess.
So, Lord, this silent plea I make:
Should I be shot; My soul please take!
Amen
 
 
If you aren't ashamed to do this, Please pass this on..
Jesus said, 'If you are ashamed of me, I will be ashamed of you before my Father.'

Not ashamed. Pass this on.


*******************************

The Universal Life Church is a comprehensive online seminary where we have various classes in Christianity, one on Wicca, along with several Pagan courses, more than a few courses about Metaphysics with more being added regularly.

Ordination with the Universal Life Church, is free, legal and lasts for life, so please take advantage of our Free Online Ordination.

The  ULC, run by Rev. Long, has created a chaplaincy program to help train our ministers. We also have a huge catalog of minister supplies.  I've been ordained with the Universal Life Church for many years and am proud to have started the Seminary.


Try our new free toolbar at: ULC Toolbar
 

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Kind Words

Thank you so much Amy. You are like medicine to  me..Love You: David 
***********************
As a long time member of ULC, I created the seminary site to help train our ministers. We also have a huge selection of Universal Life Church minister supplies. Since being ordained with the Seminary since the beginning, I've watched and facilitated the huge change and growth that has continued to happen.  I also started sending out Kind Words, which has been a huge hit with the congregation.

Monday, November 21, 2011

Kind Words

Dear Rev. Amy Long

First and foremost, THANK YOU for all that you have done to help me with my evolving ministry.  Your guidance, suggestions and willingness to discuss on the phone, "the stuff" the makes being a ULC Minister possible and fun, has helped greatly!  I thought you should know, that for me, you have done well and made it possible for me to be of service!

Also, I wanted to wish you and your family endless Blessings and Prosperity for this Holiday Season and into the New Year!

Very Warm Regards,

Reverend James DiMario
Ordination with the Universal Life Church, is free,  and lasts for life, so use the Free Online Ordination, button.We also offer many free wedding ceremonies for your use.  We also offer some kind words, mailed weekly, to brighten your spirit.

Saturday, November 19, 2011

Kind Words

Dear Amy:
The Great Spirit, God, the flow of the earth,, must have known I needed your attention and words.  It's almost telepathic; knowing I was bored some years ago in another profession, was one of the main reasons I'm doing what I am.  With sincere appreciation thank you so very much for taking time to speak to this tired confused soul seeking man. 
Your words help..as well as your guidance.
Also I may not get the time to read through all your e-mails on the Seminary courses,  However, I've been saving them for years in a special file just for those e-mails.
Thank you and your great Spirit for all the work you are doing,
Sincerely,
Roy
Universal Life Church 
Ordination with the Universal Life Church, is free,  and lasts for life, so use the Free Online Ordination, button.We also offer many free wedding ceremonies for your use.  We also offer some kind words, mailed weekly, to brighten your spirit.

Friday, November 18, 2011

Universal Life Church


In September 1960, I woke up one morning with six hungry babies and just 75 cents in my pocket.

Their father was gone..

The boys ranged from three months to seven years; their sister was two.

Their Dad had never been much more than a presence they feared.

Whenever they heard his tires crunch on the gravel driveway they would scramble to hide under their beds.

He did manage to leave $15 a week to buy groceries.

Now that he had decided to leave, there would be no more beatings, but no food either.

If there was a welfare system in effect in southern Indiana at that time, I certainly knew nothing about it.

I scrubbed the kids until they looked brand new and then put on my best homemade dress, loaded them into the rusty old 51 Chevy and drove off to find a job.

The seven of us went to every factory, store and restaurant in our small town.

No luck.

The kids stayed crammed into the car and tried to be quiet while I tried to convince who ever would listen that I was willing to learn or do anything. I had to have a job.

Still no luck. The last place we went to, just a few miles out of town, was an old Root Beer Barrel drive-in that had been converted to a truck stop.

It was called the Big Wheel.

An old lady named Granny owned the place and she peeked out of the window from time to time at all those kids.

She needed someone on the graveyard shift, 11 at night until seven in the morning.

She paid 65 cents an hour, and I could start that night.

I raced home and called the teenager down the street that baby-sat for people.
I bargained with her to come and sleep on my sofa for a dollar a night.

She could arrive with her pajamas on and the kids would already be asleep

This seemed like a good arrangement to her, so we made a deal.

That night when the little ones and I knelt to say our prayers, we all thanked God for finding Mommy a job.. And so I started at the Big Wheel.

When I got home in the mornings I woke the baby-sitter up and sent her home with one dollar of my tip money-- fully half of what I averaged every night.

As the weeks went by, heating bills added a strain to my meager wage.

The tires on the old Chevy had the consistency of penny balloons and began to leak. I had to fill them with air on the way to work and again every morning before I could go home.

One bleak fall morning, I dragged myself to the car to go home and found four tires in the back seat. New tires!

There was no note, no nothing, just those beautiful brand new tires.

Had angels taken up residence in Indiana ? I wondered.

I made a deal with the local service station.

In exchange for his mounting the new tires, I would clean up his office.

I remember it took me a lot longer to scrub his floor than it did for him to do the tires.

I was now working six nights instead of five and it still wasn't enough.

Christmas was coming and I knew there would be no money for toys for the kids .

I found a can of red paint and started repairing and painting some old toys. Then I hid them in the basement so there would be something for Santa to deliver on Christmas morning.

Clothes were a worry too. I was sewing patches on top of patches on the boys pants and soon they would be too far gone to repair.

On Christmas Eve the usual customers were drinking coffee in the Big Wheel. There were the truckers, Les, Frank, and Jim, and a state trooper named Joe.

A few musicians were hanging around after a gig at the Legion and were dropping nickels in the pinball machine.

The regulars all just sat around and talked through the wee hours of the morning and then left to get home before the sun came up.

When it was time for me to go home at seven o'clock on Christmas morning, to my amazement, my old battered Chevy was filled full to the top with boxes of all shapes and sizes.

I quickly opened the driver's side door, crawled inside and kneeled in the front facing the back seat..

Reaching back, I pulled off the lid of the top box.

Inside was whole case of little blue jeans, sizes 2-10!

I looked inside another box: It was full of shirts to go with the jeans.

Then I peeked inside some of the other boxes. There was candy and nuts and bananas and bags of groceries. There was an enormous ham for baking, and canned vegetables and potatoes.

There was pudding and Jell-O and cookies, pie filling and flour. There was whole bag of laundry supplies and cleaning items.

And there were five toy trucks and one beautiful little doll.

As I drove back through empty streets as the sun slowly rose on the most amazing Christmas Day of my life, I was sobbing with gratitude.

And I will never forget the joy on the faces of my little ones that precious morning.

Yes, there were angels in Indiana that long-ago December. And they all hung out at the Big Wheel truck stop.

THE POWER OF PRAYER. I believe that God only gives three answers to prayer:



1. 'Yes!'

2. 'Not yet.'

3! have something better in mind.'
God still sits on the throne, and the devil is a liar.
You may be going through a tough time right now but God is getting ready to bless you in a way that you cannot imagine.


*******************************

The Universal Life Church is a comprehensive online seminary where we have various classes in Christianity, one on Wicca, along with several Pagan courses, more than a few courses about Metaphysics with more being added regularly.

Ordination with the Universal Life Church, is free, legal and lasts for life, so please take advantage of our Free Online Ordination.

The  ULC, run by Rev. Long, has created a chaplaincy program to help train our ministers. We also have a huge catalog of minister supplies.  I've been ordained with the Universal Life Church for many years and am proud to have started the Seminary.


Try our new free toolbar at: ULC Toolbar
 

Monday, November 14, 2011

Kind Words

Hello Amy, I just had to share with you my experience. My brother came to see me from Arizona, and he has studied the bible for some time and been active with his church. He came to see my Mom who I've been caring for, and we started to talk and I shared some reading I've been doing in my studies.

All of a sudden he said "you've changed, you look really good, I can see it in your eyes, you have the Mark I can see it. I was so shocked and complimented. At once it became clear what he was talking about and what Pastor Dan was speaking about in Lesson 2.

My brother was very excited and we had a great discussion which I believe has strengthened our relationship. I finally understand about the Divine Mark, and I do feel truly blessed.
Sincerely,
Rev Patricia

Friday, November 11, 2011

Universal Life Church


YOU REAP WHAT YOU SOW
 
Good morning said a woman as she walked up to the man sitting on ground.
The man slowly looked up.

This was a woman clearly accustomed to the finer things of life. Her coat was new... She looked like she had never missed a meal in her life.

His first thought was that she wanted to make fun of him, like so many others had done before..  "Leave me alone," he growled....

To his amazement, the woman continued standing.

She was smiling -- her even white teeth displayed in dazzling rows. "Are you hungry?" she asked.

"No," he answered sarcastically. "I've just come from dining with the president. Now go away."

The woman's smile became even broader. Suddenly the man felt a gentle hand under his arm. 

"What are you doing, lady?" the man asked angrily. "I said to leave me alone.

Just then a policeman came up. "Is there any problem, ma'am?" he asked..

"No problem here, officer," the woman answered. "I'm just trying to get this man to his feet. Will you help me?"

The officer scratched his head.  "That's old Jack. He's been a fixture around here for a couple of years. What do you want with him?"

"See that cafeteria over there?" she asked. "I'm going to get him something to eat and get him out of the cold for awhile." 

"Are you crazy, lady?" the homeless man resisted. "I don't want to go in there!"  Then he felt strong hands grab his other arm and lift him up.  "Let me go, officer. I didn't do anything."
" This is a good deal for you, Jack" the officer answered. "Don't blow it.." 

Finally, and with some difficulty, the woman and the police officer got Jack into the cafeteria and sat him at a table in a remote corner.  It was the middle of the morning, so most of the breakfast crowd had already left and the lunch bunch had not yet arrived...

The manager strode across the cafeteria and stood by his table.  "What's going on here, officer?" he asked.  "What is all this, is this man in trouble?"

"This lady brought this man in here to be fed," the policeman answered. 

"Not in here!" the manager replied angrily. "Having a person like that here is bad for business.."

Old Jack smiled a toothless grin.  "See, lady. I told you so. Now if you'll let me go. I didn't want to come here in the first place."   

The woman turned to the cafeteria manager and smiled..... "Sir, are you familiar with Eddy and Associates, the banking firm down the street?" 

"Of course I am," the manager answered impatiently. "They hold their weekly meetings in one of my banquet rooms." 

"And do you make a goodly amount of money providing food at these weekly meetings?"

"What business is that of yours?"

I, sir, am Penelope Eddy, president and CEO of the company."

"Oh." 

The woman smiled again. "I thought that might make a difference."  She glanced at the cop who was busy stifling a giggle. "Would you like to join us in a cup of coffee and a meal, officer?"

"No thanks, ma'am," the officer replied. "I'm on duty." 

"Then, perhaps, a cup of coffee to go?"
"Yes, mam. That would be very nice." 

The cafeteria manager turned on his heel, "I'll get your coffee for you right away, officer." 

The officer watched him walk away. "You certainly put him in his place," he said.

"That was not my intent. Believe it or not, I have a reason for all this."   

She sat down at the table across from her amazed dinner guest. She stared at him intently...  "Jack, do you remember me?"

Old Jack searched her face with his old, rheumy eyes.  "I think so -- I mean you do look familiar."

"I'm a little older perhaps," she said. "Maybe I've even filled out more than in my younger days when you worked here, and I came through that very door, cold and hungry."

"Ma'am?" the officer said questioningly.  He couldn't believe that such a magnificently turned out woman could ever have been hungry.

"I was just out of college," the woman began.. "I had come to the city looking for a job, but I couldn't find anything.  Finally I was down to my last few cents and had been kicked out of my apartment. I walked the streets for days.  It was February and I was cold and nearly starving. I saw this place and walked in on the off chance that I could get something to eat."

Jack lit up with a smile.  "Now I remember," he said..  "I was behind the serving counter.  You came up and asked me if you could work for something to eat. I said that it was against company policy." 

"I know," the woman continued. "Then you made me the biggest roast beef sandwich that I had ever seen, gave me a cup of coffee, and told me to go over to a corner table and enjoy it.  I was afraid that you would get into trouble... Then, when I looked over and saw you put the price of my food in the cash register, I knew then that everything would be all right."

"So you started your own business?" Old Jack said.

"I got a job that very afternoon. I worked my way up.  Eventually I started my own business that, with the help of God, prospered." She opened her purse and pulled out a business card.. "When you are finished here, I want you to pay a visit to a Mr. Lyons...He's the personnel director of my company. I'll go talk to him now and I'm certain he'll find something for you to do around the office."  She smiled.  "I think he might even find the funds to give you a little advance so that you can buy some clothes and get a place to live until you get on your feet... If you ever need anything, my door is always opened to you."

There were tears in the old man's eyes. "How can I ever thank you?" he said.
"Don't thank me," the woman answered. "To God goes the glory. Thank Jesus... He led me to you." 

Outside the cafeteria, the officer and the woman paused at the entrance before going their separate ways....

"Thank you for all your help, officer," she said.

"On the contrary, Ms. Eddy," he answered. "Thank you. I saw a miracle today, something that I will never forget. And..And thank you for the coffee"

If you have missed knowing me, you have missed nothing.

If you have missed some of my emails, you might have missed a laugh.. 

But, if you have missed knowing my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, you have missed everything in the world. 

Have a Wonderful Day. May God Bless You Always and don't forget that when you "cast your bread upon the waters," you never know how it will be returned to you..
God is so big He can cover the whole world with his Love and so small He can curl up inside your heart..

When God leads you to the edge of the cliff, trust Him fully and let go.
Only 1 of 2 things will happen, either He'll catch you when you fall, or He'll teach you how to fly!

The  power of one sentence!

God is going to shift things around for you today and  let things work in your favor.

If you believe, send it.
If you don't believe, delete it.

God closes doors no man can open & God opens doors no man can close..
If you need God to open some doors for you...send this on.

Have a blessed day and remember to be a blessing...
LIVE WELL, LOVE MUCH, LAUGH OFTEN 


*******************************

The Universal Life Church is a comprehensive online seminary where we have various classes in Christianity, one on Wicca, along with several Pagan courses, more than a few courses about Metaphysics with more being added regularly.

Ordination with the Universal Life Church, is free, legal and lasts for life, so please take advantage of our Free Online Ordination.

The  ULC, run by Rev. Long, has created a chaplaincy program to help train our ministers. We also have a huge catalog of minister supplies.  I've been ordained with the Universal Life Church for many years and am proud to have started the Seminary.


Try our new free toolbar at: ULC Toolbar
 

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Kind Words

Ya know Amy, these really are a nice little pick-me-up. Thanks for taking the time to do it. You're a good one, yourself.
Julie
Ordination with the Universal Life Church, is free,  and lasts for life, so use the Free Online Ordination, button.We also offer many free wedding ceremonies for your use.  We also offer some kind words, mailed weekly, to brighten your spirit.

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Kind Words

Amy,

Thank you for taking time to write me such a personal and heart-warming message.
I am touched deeply by your words.
Thank you.

Mark

Ordination with the Universal Life Church, is free,  and lasts for life, so use the Free Online Ordination, button.We also offer many free wedding ceremonies for your use.  We also offer some kind words, mailed weekly, to brighten your spirit. 

Friday, November 4, 2011

Universal Life Church



Truths for Mature Humans

1.                 I think part of a best friend's job should be to
immediately clear your computer history if you die.

2.                 Nothing sucks more than that moment during an
argument when you realize you're wrong.

3.                 I totally take back all those times I didn't want to
nap when I was younger.

4.                 There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5.                 How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6.                 Was learning cursive really necessary?

7.                 Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they
told you how the person died.

8.                 I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind
of tired.

9.                 Bad decisions make good stories.

10.             You never know when it will strike, but there comes a
moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything
productive for the rest of the day.

11.             Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after
BluRay?  I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

12.             I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word
and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical
report that I swear I did not make any changes to.

13.             "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never
wash this - ever.

14.             I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello?
Hello? Damn it!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times
and goes to voice mail. What did you do after I didn't answer?  Drop the
phone and run away?

15.             I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and
then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day.  What a waste.

16.             I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I
know not to answer when they call.

17.             I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

18.             Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was
younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on
when I first saw it.

19.             I would rather try to carry 10 over-loaded plastic bags
in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

20.             I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between
boredom and hunger.

21.             How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before
you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a
word they said?

22.             I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of
cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front.  Stay
strong, brothers and sisters!

23.             Shirts get dirty.  Underwear gets dirty.  Pants?  Pants
never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

24.             Is it just me or do high school kids get dumber and
dumber every year?

25.             There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're
sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

26.             As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I
hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always
hate bicyclists.

27.             Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times
and still not know what time it is.

28.             Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating
their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the
Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze
button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time,
every time!




Expecting life to treat you well because you are
a good person is like expecting an angry bull not
to charge because you are a vegetarian.
                                                       -- Shari R. Barr

*******************************

The Universal Life Church is a comprehensive online seminary where we have various classes in Christianity, one on Wicca, along with several Pagan courses, more than a few courses about Metaphysics with more being added regularly.

Ordination with the Universal Life Church, is free, legal and lasts for life, so please take advantage of our Free Online Ordination.

The  ULC, run by Rev. Long, has created a chaplaincy program to help train our ministers. We also have a huge catalog of minister supplies.  I've been ordained with the Universal Life Church for many years and am proud to have started the Seminary.


Try our new free toolbar at: ULC Toolbar
 

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Kind Words

Amy, this is awesome!!  I am so proud to be a part of this seminary!!  Keep sending wonderful information.......and spreading your Awesome LIGHT!!
Love and Blessings,
Deb

Ordination with the Universal Life Church, is free,  and lasts for life, so use the Free Online Ordination, button.We also offer many free wedding ceremonies for your use.  We also offer some kind words, mailed weekly, to brighten your spirit.

Friday, October 28, 2011

Universal Life Church


She jumped up as soon as she saw the surgeon come out of the operating room. She said: 'How is my little boy? Is he going to be all right? When can I see him?'

The surgeon said, 'I'm sorry. We did all we could, but your boy didn't make it.'


Sally said, 'Why do little children get cancer? Doesn't God care any more? Where were you, God, when my son needed you?'


The surgeon asked, 'Would you like some time alone with your son? One of the nurses will be out in a few minutes, before he's transported to the university.'


Sally asked the nurse to stay with her while she said good bye to son. She ran her fingers lovingly through his thick red curly hair. 'Would you like a lock of his hair?' the nurse asked. Sally nodded yes. The nurse cut a lock of the boy's hair, put it in a plastic bag and handed it to Sally.


The mother said, 'It was Jimmy's idea to donate his body to the University for Study. He said it might help somebody else. 'I said no at first, but Jimmy said, ' Mom , I won't be using it after I die. Maybe it will help some other little boy spend one more day with his Mom ..' She went on, 'My Jimmy had a heart of gold. Always thinking of someone else.. Always wanting to help others if he could.'


Sally walked out of Children's Mercy Hospital for the last time, after spending most of the last six months there. She put the bag with Jimmy's belongings on the seat beside her in the car.


The drive home was difficult. It was even harder to enter the empty house. She carried Jimmy's belongings, and the plastic bag with the lock of his hair to her son's room.


She started placing the model cars and other personal things back in his room exactly where he had always kept them. She lay down across his bed and, hugging his pillow, cried herself to sleep.


It was around midnight when Sally awoke. Lying beside her on the bed was a folded letter. 

The letter said:

'Dear Mom ,


I know you're going to miss me; but don't think that I will ever forget you, or stop loving you, just 'cause I'm not around to say 'I Love You'. I will always love you, Mom , even more with each day. Someday we will see each other again. Until then, if you want to adopt a little boy so you won't be so lonely, that's okay with me. He can have my room and old stuff to play with. But, if you decide to get a girl instead, she probably wouldn't like the same things us boys do. You'll have to buy her dolls and stuff girls like, you know.

Don't be sad thinking about me. This really is a neat place.. Grandma and Grandpa met me as soon as I got here and showed me around some, but it will take a long time to see everything. The angels are so cool. I love to watch them fly. And, you know what? Jesus doesn't look like any of his pictures. Yet, when I saw Him, I knew it was Him. Jesus himself took me to see GOD! And guess what, Mom ? I got to sit on God's knee and talk to Him, like I was somebody important. That's when I told Him that I wanted to write you a letter, to tell you good bye and everything. But I already knew that wasn't allowed. Well, you know what Mom ? God handed me some paper and His own personal pen to write you this letter I think Gabriel is the name of the angel who is going to drop thi s letter off to you. G od sai d for me t o give you the answ er to one of the questions you asked Him 'where was He when I needed him?' 'God said He was in the same place with me, as when His son Jesus was on the cross. He was right there, as He always is with all His children.


Oh, by the way, Mom , no one else can see what I've written except you. To everyone else this is just a blank piece of paper. Isn't that cool? I have to give God His pen back now He needs it to write some more names in the Book of Life. Tonight I get to sit at the table with Jesus for supper. I'm sure the food will be great.


Oh, I almost forgot to tell you. I don't hurt anymore the cancer is all gone.. I'm glad because I couldn't stand that pain anymore and God couldn't stand to see me hurt so much, either. That's when He sent The Angel of Mercy to come get me. The Angel said I was a Special Delivery! How about that,
AND NEVER FORGET I LOVE YOU!


Signed with Love from God, Jesus,Gabriel & Me.

*******************************

The Universal Life Church is a comprehensive online seminary where we have various classes in Christianity, one on Wicca, along with several Pagan courses, more than a few courses about Metaphysics with more being added regularly.

Ordination with the Universal Life Church, is free, legal and lasts for life, so please take advantage of our Free Online Ordination.

The  ULC, run by Rev. Long, has created a chaplaincy program to help train our ministers. We also have a huge catalog of minister supplies.  I've been ordained with the Universal Life Church for many years and am proud to have started the Seminary.


Try our new free toolbar at: ULC Toolbar
 

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Saturday, October 22, 2011

Kind Words

Amy,
Thank you!  Your kind comments really give me a lift today.  It is so true that we often impact the lives around us and do not see the impact.  I have been blessed on a couple of occasions to have some visit me after some years have passed and listen to their testimony how they were impacted by something I said or did years ago.  I see that as a divine pat on the back sometimes.

Thanks for your ministry and being a blessing to so many through ULC!
In Christ's love,
Dan

Ordination with the Universal Life Church, is free,  and lasts for life, so use the Free Online Ordination, button.We also offer many free wedding ceremonies for your use.  We also offer some kind words, mailed weekly, to brighten your spirit.

Friday, October 21, 2011

Universal Life Church



The Wooden Bowl

 I guarantee you will remember the tale of the Wooden Bowl
tomorrow, a week from now, a month from now, a year from now.

A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law, and four-year-old grandson.  The old man's hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred, and his step faltered.  The family ate together at the table. But the elderly grandfather's shaky hands and failing sight made eating difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon onto the floor.  When he grasped the glass, milk spilled on the tablecloth.  The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess.
'We must do something about father,' said the son.  'I've had enough of his spilled milk, noisy eating, and food on the floor..'  So the husband and wife set a small table in the corner.  There, Grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner.
Since Grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in a wooden bowl.
When the family glanced in Grandfather's direction, sometimes he had a tear in his eye as he sat alone.  Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food.  The four-year-old watched it all in silence.  One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor.
He asked the child sweetly, 'What are you making?' Just as sweetly, the boy responded, 'Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and Mama to eat your food in when I grow up.
' The four-year-old smiled and went back to work.  The words so struck the parents so that they were speechless.  Then tears started to stream down their cheeks. Though no
word was spoken, both knew what must be done.  That evening the husband took Grandfather's hand and gently led him back to the family table.  For the remainder of his
days he ate every meal with the family... And for some reason, neither husband nor wife
seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk spilled, or the tablecloth soiled.
On a positive note, I've learned that, no matter what happens, how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow.

I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles four things:
a rainy day, the elderly, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.

I've learned that making a 'living' is not the same thing as
making a 'life..'

I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance.

I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catcher's mitt on both hands. You need to be able to throw something back sometimes.

I've learned that if you pursue happiness, it will elude you.  But, if you focus on God,
your family, your friends, the needs of others, your work and doing the very best you can, happiness will find you.

I've learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision.
I've learned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one.

I've learned that every day, you should reach out and touch someone.  People love that human touch -- holding hands, a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back.

I've learned that I still have a lot to learn.

*******************************

The Universal Life Church is a comprehensive online seminary where we have various classes in Christianity, one on Wicca, along with several Pagan courses, more than a few courses about Metaphysics with more being added regularly.

Ordination with the Universal Life Church, is free, legal and lasts for life, so please take advantage of our Free Online Ordination.

The  ULC, run by Rev. Long, has created a chaplaincy program to help train our ministers. We also have a huge catalog of minister supplies.  I've been ordained with the Universal Life Church for many years and am proud to have started the Seminary.


Try our new free toolbar at: ULC Toolbar
 

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Kind Words

Hi  Rev. Amy,
I appreciated Lesson 4 of your spirituality course; I enjoyed the adept example of quantum mechanics and the ever present fact of God.  I am ending a Lutheran ministry and in the
process of establishing a place of meaningful worship within our one rule "Harm none";
  Keep me on your mailing list; I definitely will sign up for classes- we all need inspiration from other minds.
   Blessings of your choices
Sincerely,

  Rev.Charise Anderson
Universal Life Church 

Ordination with the Universal Life Church, is free,  and lasts for life, so use the Free Online Ordination, button.We also offer many free wedding ceremonies for your use.  We also offer some kind words, mailed weekly, to brighten your spirit.

Friday, October 14, 2011

Universal Life Church


SCARS OF LIFE

     Some years ago,
On a hot summer day
In South Florida ,
A little boy decided to go
For a swim in the old swimming hole behind his house.
In a hurry to dive into
The cool water,
He ran out the back door, leaving behind shoes, socks, and shirt as he went.
He flew into the water,
Not realizing that as he swam toward the middle of the lake, an alligator was swimming toward the shore.

His father, working in the yard, saw the two as they got closer and closer together.
In utter fear,
He ran toward the water,
Yelling to his son as loudly
As he could.

Hearing his voice,
The little boy became alarmed and made a U-turn
To swim to his father.
It was too late.
Just as he reached his father, the alligator reached him.

>From the dock,
The father grabbed his little boy by the arms
Just as the alligator
Snatched his legs...
That began an incredible
Tug-of-war between the two. The alligator was much stronger than the father,
But the father was much
Too passionate to let go.

A farmer happened to drive by, heard his screams,
Raced from his truck,
Took aim and shot the alligator.

Remarkably, after weeks and weeks in the hospital,
The little boy survived.
His legs were extremely scarred by the vicious attack
Of the animal.
And, on his arms,
Were deep scratches
Where his father's fingernails dug into his flesh in his effort
To hang on to the son he loved.

The newspaper reporter
Who interviewed the boy
After the trauma,
Asked if he would
Show him his scars.
The boy lifted his pant legs. And then, with obvious pride, he said to the reporter,
'But look at my arms.
I have great scars
On my arms, too.
I have them because
My Dad wouldn't let go.'

You and I can identify
With that little boy.
We have scars, too.
No, not from an alligator,
But the scars of a painful past. Some of those scars
Are unsightly and have
Caused us deep regret.
But, some wounds,
My friend,
Are because God has refused
To let go.
In the midst of your struggle, He's been there
Holding on to you...

The scripture teaches that
God loves you.
You are a child of God.
He wants to protect you
And
Provide for you in every way. But sometimes we foolishly wade into dangerous situations, not knowing what lies ahead. The swimming hole of life
Is filled with peril -
And we forget
That the enemy is waiting
To attack.
That's when the tug-of-war begins - and if you have
The scars of His love
On your arms,
Be very, very grateful.
He did not and will not ever let you go.


*******************************

The Universal Life Church is a comprehensive online seminary where we have various classes in Christianity, one on Wicca, along with several Pagan courses, more than a few courses about Metaphysics with more being added regularly.

Ordination with the Universal Life Church, is free, legal and lasts for life, so please take advantage of our Free Online Ordination.

The  ULC, run by Rev. Long, has created a chaplaincy program to help train our ministers. We also have a huge catalog of minister supplies.  I've been ordained with the Universal Life Church for many years and am proud to have started the Seminary.


Try our new free toolbar at: ULC Toolbar