Universal Life Church

Alas, where has all our innocence gone?

While I sat in the reception area    of my doctor's office, a woman rolled an elderly man    in a wheelchair into the room.  As she went     to the receptionist's desk, the man sat there, alone    and silent.  Just as I was thinking I should make    small talk with him, a little boy slipped off    his mother's lap and walked over to    the wheelchair.  Placing his hand on the     man's, he said, 'I know how you feel.  My    mom makes me ride in the stroller too.' ***** As I was nursing    my baby, my cousin's six-year-old    daughter, Krissy, came into the room.     Never having seen anyone breast feed    before, she was intrigued and full of all    kinds of questions about what I was doing.     After mulling over my answers, she remarked, 'My mom    has some of those, but I don't think she knows    how to use them.' ***** Out bicycling    one day with my eight-year-old    granddaughter, Carolyn, I got a little    wistful.  'In ten years,' I said, 'you'll want    to be with your friends and you won't go    walking, biking, and swimming with me like you do    now.  Carolyn shrugged.  'In ten years you'll be    too old to do all those things anyway.' ****** Working as a pediatric    nurse, I had the difficult assignment    of giving immunization shots to children.     One day, I entered the examining room to give    four-year-old Lizzie her needle. 'No, no, no!' she     screamed.  'Lizzie,' scolded her mother, 'that's    not polite behavior.'  With that, the girl    yelled even louder, 'No, thank you!  No, thank     you! ****** On the way back from a Cub  Scout meeting, my grandson innocently said to my son,    'Dad, I know babies come from mommies' tummies, but    how do they get there in the first place?'  After my    son hemmed and hawed awhile, my grandson finally    spoke up in disgust, 'You don't have to make    up something, Dad.  It's okay if you don't    know the answer.' ***** Just before I    was deployed to Iraq , I  sat my eight-year-old    son down and broke the news to  him.  'I'm    going to be away for a long time,' I told     him.  'I'm going to Iraq .'   'Why?' he    asked.  'Don't you know there's a war going    on  over there?' ***** Paul Newman    founded the Hole in the Wall Gang Camp for     children stricken with cancer, AIDS, and blood    diseases.  One afternoon, he and his wife,    Joanne Woodward, stopped by to have lunch with    the kids.  A counselor at a nearby    table, suspecting the young patients    wouldn't know Newman was a famous movie star,    explained, 'That's the man who made this camp    possible.  Maybe you've seen his picture on    his salad dressing bottle?'  Blank    stares.  'Well, you've probably seen his face on    his lemonade carton.'  An eight-year-old girl    perked  up.  'How long was he missing?' ***** God's  Problem Now. His wife's graveside service was just barely finished, when  there was  massive clap of thunder, followed by a tremendous   bolt of lightning, accompanied by even more thunder rumbling in the distance.  The little, old man looked at the  pastor and calmly said,  'Well, she's there.

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The Universal Life Church is a comprehensive online seminary where we have various classes in Christianity, one on Wicca, along with several Pagan courses, more than a few courses about Metaphysics with more being added regularly.

Ordination with the Universal Life Church, is free, legal and lasts for life, so please take advantage of our Free Online Ordination.

The  ULC, run by Rev. Long, has created a chaplaincy program to help train our ministers. We also have a huge catalog of minister supplies.  I've been ordained with the Universal Life Church for many years and am proud to have started the Seminary.

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